Fear

I don't know why
This feeling plagued me
Robbed me of my sleep
Infected my mind.

I feel so worthless,
Unable to discern
Between right and wrong,
Between true and false.

Someone,
Please help me.
Prevent me,
From going back to
The way I once was..

Bitter.
Disappointed.
Rejected.
Shunned.
Fake.

I have kept my
Emotions behind
A impeccable mask.
Everyday seems,
Like a never ending
Masquerade.

It hurts,
Terribly.
Every word is like
A stab in the heart.
Every lie is like
A twist of the blade.
Every hope is like
A dicing of the soul.
Every disappointment is like
A tearing of the fabric

Even as I slowly,
Slowly
Recovered.
The scars are still there.
Refusing to remove itself,
From my memory.
I hated it.
Deeply
How I allowed myself
To let
Myself play with fire,
Get burnt,
Till,
When that person emerged
From the fire,
It is no longer

Me.