Self Reflection

Reflected
Wondered
Shamed
Feared

Trying to see
Who I really am.
Came up with
An ugly picture
Of deceit
And lies.

I wondered
Did anyone
Despise me
Because
Of this?

Shamed to feel
So dirty
And low
Manipulative
Calculative

I feared to see
If I am truly like that
Or was I just
Paranoid
As always?